this may possibly be the best chance for me to rediscover how lousy a friend, a child, a sister i have been.

this blog is one of the things that's always there, no matter how much i neglect it. it's practically the next best thing after family & friends. that said, nth can ever match up to the standards of family & friends.

ive always thought that leaving home is no kick. internet, phones, what else are we short of?

but just 3 weeks and im missing home :/

all will be better when sch stops :O

just to update abit on our canadian adventures,
the girls went to do our shopping on sat and we ended the day w dinner in chinatown. but we would have never expected ourselves to end up at pender street...one of the druggie streets in vancouver...
we dint know about the reputation of this street until we told the story to a friend ytd. anw, we just came out of the chinatown area and were walking down this dark street with weird people, when some guy kept calling for us to stop...i swear i was going to faint lol but we just walked faster until we realised that the road ahead dint look very promising either haha. so we were stuck in the middle of the street (the crazy guy from before was still there if we turned back). then we just stood at a random bus stand, luckily some bus came and we hopped on towards downturn where people are normal.

beary lucky

exchange is kinda great, even with the shit load of school work. im so used to being surrounded by mountains and greens im starting to stop staring haha

but i dunno, maybe i have some people issues, i can't learn how to work with others well enough. im bitchy when my pms comes. whatever, i dunno. all i know is my pms is kinda to the max right now o.o
life is full of surprises. ive been so used to meeting great people, people who makes life lots more fun. and when i encounter someone less um desirable (?), i kinda hide in one corner and whine to myself.
i know you're tired, we all are. but i dunno why you expect your entire holiday to be planned by other tired but kind people. im guilty of being passive and just waiting for things to happen. but i would like to claim that at least i try to break out of it as much as i can. ya, im sure you're too tired to think. and im too tired to scream.

"anything" and "up to you" might just be one of the most selfish words in the world. (and probably one of the most frequently used during exchange.)

to my happy readers (if any), dont worry about me, i'll get over it once the pms is over and once im done whining. at least i whine with fonts. these trivial things aside, im enjoying the cold and being on the other end of the world :)

i dropped my laptop and the bloody cover cracked

why do i feel like shit all the time?! :x

dear friends, i have no intention of making you guys worry. blogging was to clear my thoughts alittle, to show tt im capable of containing those words within my laptop screen.
to be frank, i cant feel sadness any more, cos sadness is such an abstract concept, and im too tiny a character to be so affected. that is not important anymore

i have a very bad memory, but im glad i rmb what little we had together.

jasmine asked me why i mia the whole of today. ya ive been missing in action, wth is all the action. the action is in all the sms, all the calls, all the fb msgs. i dont want to be in the action. i dont want to the one to repeat the news. so i chose to shut up.

i was angry, at the whole world, at you, at her, at him, at the tv show actress who drank with two straws, at everyone but myself. i dint know what to do and where to start and this sucks.
i was angry at the ppl who posted comments on fb cos fb is just a freaking self centered place that leaches all our lives away.
but i also know that nobody was wrong, it was other people's outlet of venting their frustration, of doing whatever they can to lessen the doubts, on themselves, on the whole issue. who am i to judge.

i dunno for sure, but ytd i was trying to become a bystander, and it was sadly, almost justifiable. and i dint know where i stand. as an old friend? as an old friend who voluntarily forgot? i still dunno, and i dunno what changed.

dont worry, i know you who care, i know you who will ask me to dont think too much. ive passed the permanent stage of sadness, and i know the whole world doesnt revolve around me, im just part of the story if the rest allow. i still periodically recall bits of memory, but i cant piece them up anw. so right now im submitting to passivity, until one day we find a meaning behind all these.

i can wilfully say that this post has no meaning, so that i can make an easy exit.

this is all wrong

warning: this post may contain unpleasant imagery!

this is a post about why u shouldnt always trust your dentist....
today i went for my monthly session and he told me i needed to do the implants today (well well i agreed to it prior to putting on my braces), and i tot why not, since he told me it will NOT be painful. basically he said i needed two mini screws in my mouth cos my condition quite bad. and each of them cost freaking $150, so that's an additional $300 for me o.o
then the moment he gave me anesthesia i was like #$%^&* in my mind: NOT PAIN WHY MUST NUMB MY MOUTH?!

then lalala fast forward, when i left the clinic i rushed to the toilet to find my dear screws:

can you see that freaking screw IN MY GUM??!!

then i walked to my busstop, all the while still fine. until when my bus came, i could feel the anesthersia wearing off and i swear it was so freaking painful,
I WANTED TO DIEEEEEEE
then someone told me i better go get some panadol since the dentist dint give me painkillers so i alighted at bbp and rushed to the ntuc so quickly that i was practically running. the moment i bought the panadols i was swollowing them like a drug addict :X if it wouldnt kill me, i would have finished the whole box (i only took 2 pills la). but the whole point is IWASFREAKINGDYINGGGGGGGGGG

who the hell puts screws in their gum??!! and the dentist was saying that there's a possiblity that the screws can come off. I DONT WANT TO IMAGINE HOW HE'LL SQUEEZE ANOTHER 2 SCREWS INTO MY GUM AGAIN.

anw now the pain is slightly bearable alr.

this may possibly be the best chance for me to rediscover how lousy a friend, a child, a sister i have been.

this blog is one of the things that's always there, no matter how much i neglect it. it's practically the next best thing after family & friends. that said, nth can ever match up to the standards of family & friends.

ive always thought that leaving home is no kick. internet, phones, what else are we short of?

but just 3 weeks and im missing home :/

all will be better when sch stops :O

just to update abit on our canadian adventures,
the girls went to do our shopping on sat and we ended the day w dinner in chinatown. but we would have never expected ourselves to end up at pender street...one of the druggie streets in vancouver...
we dint know about the reputation of this street until we told the story to a friend ytd. anw, we just came out of the chinatown area and were walking down this dark street with weird people, when some guy kept calling for us to stop...i swear i was going to faint lol but we just walked faster until we realised that the road ahead dint look very promising either haha. so we were stuck in the middle of the street (the crazy guy from before was still there if we turned back). then we just stood at a random bus stand, luckily some bus came and we hopped on towards downturn where people are normal.

beary lucky

exchange is kinda great, even with the shit load of school work. im so used to being surrounded by mountains and greens im starting to stop staring haha

but i dunno, maybe i have some people issues, i can't learn how to work with others well enough. im bitchy when my pms comes. whatever, i dunno. all i know is my pms is kinda to the max right now o.o
life is full of surprises. ive been so used to meeting great people, people who makes life lots more fun. and when i encounter someone less um desirable (?), i kinda hide in one corner and whine to myself.
i know you're tired, we all are. but i dunno why you expect your entire holiday to be planned by other tired but kind people. im guilty of being passive and just waiting for things to happen. but i would like to claim that at least i try to break out of it as much as i can. ya, im sure you're too tired to think. and im too tired to scream.

"anything" and "up to you" might just be one of the most selfish words in the world. (and probably one of the most frequently used during exchange.)

to my happy readers (if any), dont worry about me, i'll get over it once the pms is over and once im done whining. at least i whine with fonts. these trivial things aside, im enjoying the cold and being on the other end of the world :)

i dropped my laptop and the bloody cover cracked

why do i feel like shit all the time?! :x

dear friends, i have no intention of making you guys worry. blogging was to clear my thoughts alittle, to show tt im capable of containing those words within my laptop screen.
to be frank, i cant feel sadness any more, cos sadness is such an abstract concept, and im too tiny a character to be so affected. that is not important anymore

i have a very bad memory, but im glad i rmb what little we had together.

jasmine asked me why i mia the whole of today. ya ive been missing in action, wth is all the action. the action is in all the sms, all the calls, all the fb msgs. i dont want to be in the action. i dont want to the one to repeat the news. so i chose to shut up.

i was angry, at the whole world, at you, at her, at him, at the tv show actress who drank with two straws, at everyone but myself. i dint know what to do and where to start and this sucks.
i was angry at the ppl who posted comments on fb cos fb is just a freaking self centered place that leaches all our lives away.
but i also know that nobody was wrong, it was other people's outlet of venting their frustration, of doing whatever they can to lessen the doubts, on themselves, on the whole issue. who am i to judge.

i dunno for sure, but ytd i was trying to become a bystander, and it was sadly, almost justifiable. and i dint know where i stand. as an old friend? as an old friend who voluntarily forgot? i still dunno, and i dunno what changed.

dont worry, i know you who care, i know you who will ask me to dont think too much. ive passed the permanent stage of sadness, and i know the whole world doesnt revolve around me, im just part of the story if the rest allow. i still periodically recall bits of memory, but i cant piece them up anw. so right now im submitting to passivity, until one day we find a meaning behind all these.

i can wilfully say that this post has no meaning, so that i can make an easy exit.

this is all wrong

warning: this post may contain unpleasant imagery!

this is a post about why u shouldnt always trust your dentist....
today i went for my monthly session and he told me i needed to do the implants today (well well i agreed to it prior to putting on my braces), and i tot why not, since he told me it will NOT be painful. basically he said i needed two mini screws in my mouth cos my condition quite bad. and each of them cost freaking $150, so that's an additional $300 for me o.o
then the moment he gave me anesthesia i was like #$%^&* in my mind: NOT PAIN WHY MUST NUMB MY MOUTH?!

then lalala fast forward, when i left the clinic i rushed to the toilet to find my dear screws:

can you see that freaking screw IN MY GUM??!!

then i walked to my busstop, all the while still fine. until when my bus came, i could feel the anesthersia wearing off and i swear it was so freaking painful,
I WANTED TO DIEEEEEEE
then someone told me i better go get some panadol since the dentist dint give me painkillers so i alighted at bbp and rushed to the ntuc so quickly that i was practically running. the moment i bought the panadols i was swollowing them like a drug addict :X if it wouldnt kill me, i would have finished the whole box (i only took 2 pills la). but the whole point is IWASFREAKINGDYINGGGGGGGGGG

who the hell puts screws in their gum??!! and the dentist was saying that there's a possiblity that the screws can come off. I DONT WANT TO IMAGINE HOW HE'LL SQUEEZE ANOTHER 2 SCREWS INTO MY GUM AGAIN.

anw now the pain is slightly bearable alr.

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ox

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